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Weddings
No offense bobkro (ITYAFG)
I am 39 yrs old have 2 houses paid off along with 160 acres of wooded property. There is no way what so ever I could of ever done that if I had a wedding bill to pay off.
Here is the way it works in the real world (our new generation of kids dont understand this) Your parents tell you how much they will donate to the wedding. You look at what you have in the BANK!!!! Not a charge card or loan. You take what you can afford and have the money in your hand. Keep the cost under that.
Parents of future brides:
Here is a bit of advice (only my opinion)
1. If your kid is under 30 give them 1K only.
Tell them to make it work.
2. If you were going to give them more, take that money
put it in a cd, and when they go to buy their first
house or 5 years later (which ever come last) give
them a gift of the rest of the money.
Reasons behind this whacked kind of thinking? If it is your daughter getting married, over 25% dont last very long. She can them use that money to divorce her true love.
If it is your son? He then can use that money to defend himself as good as he can (if kids are involved.
If they stay married and life is good? They will think the world of you when they go to buy a house after 5 years or more and they find out after wards that you will give them that money to put down on the principle (principle is the key word!!!! not just a gift for a trip)
I see this all the time in my area. 26 year olds getting hitched and having a kid right away. Both have good jobs. The bank tells them they can afford a house that they obviosly can not and live the right way. Both parents work all the time day care fights over money 2 new cars in the driveway, credit card debt up the ying yang whala Divorce!!!!!
I agree with some of the others here. Keep your money in your pocket, no gift is worth giving until they have earned the gift.
Bah Humbug!
PS I just be entering my 20th year of wedded bliss (april 5th this year) I turned 40 this week. Been there done that survived (so far)
Pss
In 1985 rock was in big time! I had polish polka's along with 50's 60's music mixed with the new rock music at that time (about a 50% split) My wedding guests loved it. MY requirement for the band was that the first 2 hours they toned it down and played a mix with the stress put on the older tunes. The last 2 hours I wanted to rock the house! ALL my guests loved the wedding!!! ALL OF THEM! The older folks were content with 2 hours of easy going mixed with some rock. The younger ones actually like hearing it also knowing that soon the old folk would be retireing to their geritol bottles and would be leaving as soon as the music changed. WE really rocked the house!
The band learned a song they never knew because we requested it. It was called something like "I knew the bride when she used to rock and roll" When they played that song 2 hours into the gig I knew it was all over!
Hey thanks for the memories guys!!!!!
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Weddings
Ncrunch said, ""So I sent her $20/week for the first semester. She hasn't stopped working since then.""
 . Are you my twin brother? I told my kids I would pay for the first year of a STATE college. UW EauClaire
Uw Madison Etc. housing and tuition comes to under 10K or there abouts. So I told them 10 K for college is all I will give each kid. My friends called me a few names along with my sister also. I let them in on a little known secret. I told them that they make college loans and very few banks now a day make retirement loans.
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Weddings
You guys are too funny! You think your a hard ass in the house? Try living in mine! I was raised not to embarress my dad (he was a narcotics detective) or my family> Got the dung kicked out of me a few times and realized who the boss was and what I should and should not do. Flash forward 10 years and I start having kids. About the time they started to walk I have been "programming them" I know where they are and who they are with all the time. My son is about to turn 18. Have NEVER had a problem with him. Just recently he got a girl friend and has not called a few times. Apparently must think he dont have to? All it took was talking to him and he has not forgot to call since. I like to think that comes from his up bringing? Oh yeah, he is country all the way, along with his 2 friends. (chip off the ole block, never cared what was thought of me either by my peers) Now my middle child, (a daughter) is an angel, responsible, (same as my son, staright "A"s. Knows just about every country singer that comes on the radio. I dont allow wide pants in my house nor do I allow just about anything that you or I would not of been allowed to wear. (I am 40). My yongest,,,,She is anouther story, been fighting her for the last 3 years. She is 14 now. I have to fight her aunt, her friends, my mom and sometimes my wife. Seems the rules that I had for the other kids are getting bent for this one. I dont like it at all! She is starting to walk down the wrong path. I tend to nip this in the bud before it gets too far out of controll. Although rap is still not what she listens to the more HIP clothing is starting to filter in my house. This is going to stop fast! Same parents for the most part same way we raised all 3 kids thru their non_teen years. 2 kids are heading off to college and a career while 1 kid may end up chained to the basement pole. Thing that worry's me is she may like being around that pole and decide to make a carreer of it!
I do have my scape goat with her. MOVING!!!!. I can tell you this, I would not want to be any older than I am and try to do this. I am still young enough to see what she is trying to get away with and still young enough to do something about it!
Just say no to rap.
Oh yeah one last thing, want to have some fun? I do this once a week or so. Pull you underwhere over your pants, turn the hat on sideways and walk around shaking your hands saying yo yo yo. My kids think I am a idiot and tell me that. I turn around and tell them, well? what do you think you would look like doing that?
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What you can comfortably afford is the only way to go! Our kids have to realize that just because Bobbie-Sue had a wedding that was 40K and Jessica had one that dad paid for that was 21K does not mean that they have to have one of that magnitude. Every family has different income levels. I will not spend more than 3K. Fact is, that would be the wedding gift also. We are doing OK but I still want to be able to do OK in retirement
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